The Beer Sneeze & EJ's Texan Queer

Another story from the game...we had five Texas fans right behind us and they were the rudest, most obnoxious, most foul-mouthed idiots that could have possibly been in the stadium and they were very drunk before they stepped foot in the stadium. We had listened to their potty mouths and put up with childish junk like blocking our view of the jumbo screen behind us every time we turned around. Sometime in the second quarter, EJ had his phone out texting someone and all of a sudden we got spit all over. We both turned around in absolute disgust and this chick was chuckling and saying "I'm so sorry." (Too bad she wasn't an Alabama fan...she could have just said Roll Tide and it would have been enough said.) She gave no explanation for why she spit her beer all over us, so I asked her in the nicest tone I could muster. She replied, "I sneezed!" HHMMMMM??!! When I was a youngen my parents taught me to cover my mouth when I sneeze, apparently no one ever taught her the importance of etiquette. We were incredibly disgusted but decided that getting mad over it would not make the game anymore enjoyable. We turned back around and that is when I truly began cheering for Alabama at the top of my lungs. I wanted to beat those obnoxious, potty-mouthed, beer sneezing Longhorns so bad!
I am so glad we decided to pack a suitcase with a change of clothes for our short trip!!
Not to long after that incident, one of the drunk idiots behind us fell off the bleachers on EJ, and he helped him back up. Then EJ got a big ol' smack on the butt. He turned around and confronted them but way too nice. He said he really wanted to say, "I guess what they say about Texas is true...all that comes from there are steers and queers and you ain't got horns!" UGH! I wish he had said that, but anyway it just made me cheer even harder and when Alabama won it was so sweet...and guess who the first five people out of the stadium were when Alabama won...yep! Those beer sneezing queers behind us.
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